In 1971, my beloved teacher Ram Dass wrote in BE HERE NOW that “police make hippies and hippies make police.” He hit the nail on the head. Believing there’s an ‘other’ and seeing them as separate from us, polarizes our society. It creates artificial boundaries and destroys our cohesion as one human race, one human family. It was a year ripe with new observations about our life on earth, a year when astronaut Edgar Mitchell had a spiritual experience while looking at our planet from outer space and, in a revelatory moment, saw that all our borders and all of our separateness, exist only in the mind.
It’s not that we shouldn’t hold views or stand up for them, but putting people into categories, and closing down our hearts to them, is hurting us. Even when we’re so sure that we’re right.
Othering also sets us up to feel more isolated than we really are. We’re not born into bubbles- we blow them for ourselves as we grow (or have them blown for us) and then climb inside and cozy up. I was an infant at the time RD shook the world with that wisdom, before blowing any bubbles of my own.
These bubbles harden our hearts to those we see as outside them. But, as Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. said so powerfully, “Only love can overcome hate.”
What if we read MLK’s words as more than rhetoric? What would the implications be for our lives if we read them as an imperative, a statement of truth, a cornerstone in our way of being?
What do you feel?
Do us and them really exist? Personally, I don’t think so. If so, only in our minds. Like all labels, they are merely a layer we superimpose on reality, on what truly is. Not only are these categories fabricated, but they are a big part of what’s hurting our world. A huge part, in fact. It’s the divisive mind that’s driving the madness on all sides, leading us to spend our time finger-pointing instead of reaching across the aisle. It causes us to neglect what desperately needs our attention- our planet, hunger, the endless wars, and all the beings who aren’t getting what they need, but could be.
In physics, Newton’s Third Law states that every force creates equal resistance. Could this be true in human affairs too? It would seem that when we use force against those we disagree with, they push against us with equal (or greater) force. This force can be present in thoughts, words, and deeds. Whenever we’re in an us and them state of mind, we’d do well to remember Newton.
When I find myself ussing and theming from inside my bubble, I like to go deeper inside and ask, “what am I feeling here?” When I meditate, I’m able to hear what’s going on inside. As Ram Dass said, “the quieter you get, the more you can hear.”
Often what I hear when I quiet down is that there’s a sense of hurt underneath all the anger. A small child lives inside me, who didn’t have a say, who had to do what others told him. He feels hurt and frustrated. Out of that space comes the anger and blame, the feeling, “You’re forcing your will on me, your view of what’s right.” From there, I close down and react, where I could remain open and respond…..
You may have a similar story.
When a lot of people who carry similar sentiments get together in groups, us and them are born. Could it be that out of our unconscious feelings and drives, we’re creating a world we find unlivable?
Could it be that our righteousness is blinding us? When we’re convinced of our position, we forget the reality of others and insist that they’re misguided or somehow just plain wrong. We forget to question, to inquire into the reality of their lives, and into the source of their views. We forget that othering them just makes the whole world a lot sadder, a lot madder, and a whole lot more messed up.
It can also have devastating political consequences. Putting others into boxes, without listening to their reality, means not hearing or responding to their needs.
When will we learn to drop our othering, our constant creating of us and them? This question may be more important than we think, more important than any of the issues we have squabbled over for decades, for centuries, and since time immemorial. For if we can’t get together and establish a common ground, can’t address the urgent issues that face all of us, our time to solve these issues may be limited.
Are we ready to create a world without categories, to drop our labeling? It can only begin with us. Or is it easier to just continue blaming, and as Ram Dass said, continue making police or hippies as we go?
The choice is in our hands, yours and mine, and in our hearts and minds.
What will you do?
Leave your thoughts in the comments below. I’d love to hear where you’re at with all of this.
You can learn to quiet down with me so you can hear more of your own truth through mindfulness. Learn more about one-on-one meditation sessions here.
In Love and Music,
Noah
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#loveeveryone #beherenow #ramdass #onefamily
